The Words of Others

“Others” will tell you that it can’t be done. “Others” will tell you why it will fail. They will tell you to play it safe and to not change what can’t be changed. And instead, we let the words of others become our own. But here’s the thing: 

“Never base your decisions on the advice of people who don’t have to deal with the consequences.”

“Others” don’t know. “Others” are basing their opinions — and that’s all they are — on their own experiences and the way they see the world, not your experiences and the way you see it. So if that’s the case, what’s really going on?

Too often we compromise because it’s easy. We compromise out of fear. Fear because we haven’t seen it done before. Fear of what it asks of us. I wish I could sit here and tell you to fuck the fear and just do it anyway, but that would make it sound like I too can do it easily and I can’t. But I’m trying. So I would encourage you to do the same.

I read an article recently called 7 Reasons Why You Will Never Do Anything Amazing With Your Life. It’s brash and in your face. I don’t necessarily agree with it point by point, but it does serve a purpose: it made me stop and think. It shook me out of the monotony of my day and asked what David Whyte in his poem Sometimes calls “questions that have no right to go away”. And at the the end, it sums it all up:

“Finally able to understand your lack of understanding, and then you would see; then you would know that the only thing holding you back from doing something truly amazing, is you.”

It reminds me, though I rarely forget, that we all have a purpose in life. And I believe that to be decided as much by us as by any outside force in the universe, divine or otherwise. Putting the genesis of purpose to the side, following “it”, whether you understand it or not, is not easy. It’s fucking hard. It’s not always nice and pretty and tied with a colorful bow. Often it is messy, and discouraging, confusion mixed with doubt and yes, fear. It requires sacrifices that make you question how badly you really want it.

Add a verse. A verse. And if you don’t like that notion, you should at least ask yourself why? Is it because it asks too much of you, because it is too disruptive?

But one thing I can tell you having been one to both do what I am supposed to and at times turned my back on it. If you have the courage and the faith in your path, the journey is worth it. It will change you in ways not yet imagined and bring you to places you never knew you needed to be. And sometimes you can do that without ever leaving your zip code, and other times you can’t.

As my best friend once said:

“Even if it’s an errant path, sometimes it’s worth taking.”

I hear it call in the quiet moments of the day, a gentle urging to do more, one that after time can no longer be ignored without consequences to who we are and more importantly who we desire to be. Perhaps one day it will all make sense again. That is a day I very much look forward to.

All the best in your current endeavors. May they lead you to a better tomorrow.

David